By Brad Mazon, PhD.

Brad is a Bhaiyo volunteer, nonprofit consultant, husband, father, and an advocate against female genital mutilation/cutting worldwide.

I had the opportunity to attend two webinars sponsored by the Men End FGM Foundation entitled “Power of Prevention: Harnessing Positive Masculinity to Combat Violence Against Women and Girls.” The title of the webinar itself indicates that masculinity, and its implementation, can be negative or toxic. During the webinar, I almost came to think of “masculinity” as a verb, given its ability to exert either a positive or negative influence on the lives of others. The term “toxic masculinity” was mentioned throughout the webinar, as folks chimed in about the need to redefine masculinity. Toxic masculinity is the idea that to be masculine is to be inherently oppressive and controlling. “Positive masculinity” was another frequently invoked term, defined as being empathic, emotionally intelligent, and honest with one’s feelings. Toxic masculinity not only affects women but men as well. Think of all of the ways that men suffer from toxic masculinity, including how it defines their life choices, decisions about a mate, how they interact with all genders, how they dress, the music they listen to or not, whether they cry or not, and even how they perceive themselves. As a gay man, I’ve recognized how American society’s notion of masculinity has influenced my path. The webinar reinforced, yet again, how masculinity is defined directly impacts all people, no matter what your gender is.

Dr. Jacqueline Chesang spoke of how it takes years to change social and gender norms. She emphasized that a whole community approach is needed so that the perspectives of men and boys are included because men can also be barriers to change if you don’t engage with them. Dr. Chesang continued by saying that men can advocate and act as role models for anti-GBV efforts and that they can share stories of standing up to norms that harm women. Dr. Chesang also emphasized that we must not exclude men in the work to end gender-based violence. If we do, the existing discriminatory power structure will be reinforced. It made me reflect upon my Midwest fraternity days, when “little sister” parties were held with nearby sororities, but had nothing to do with being “big brothers,” and everything to do with consuming alcohol and hooking up. I’ve seen positive shifts in gender norms over time, but I also know that patriarchy continues to influence women and girls in ways that even they have assumed are “normal” or “acceptable.”

Dr. Patrick Muia Ndavi, the Coordinator for Abandonment of FGM for the Africa Center in the Department of Obstetrics at the University of Nairobi, talked about how important it is to understand power dynamics when discussing FGC.  He said that a charismatic village elder is needed to help to promote gender equality. Dr. Ndavi addressed various types of power, including skill or expert power, charismatic power, coercive power, and informational power, asking the following questions for us to reflect upon: 

1. What is the broader context of power dynamics in the community? 
2. Whose opinion matters to everyone in the community? 
3. Where does violence manifest itself in the community? 

Data is needed, he said, to develop and implement strategies to harness male decision-makers to become champions for women and girls. 

I asked myself where positive masculinity begins. Does it start at home, as one speaker advocated for, at school, or in the media? We are inundated with examples of toxic masculinity, even to the point of admiring the most toxic behaviors in our celebrities, business leaders, tribal elders, and politicians. How can we as societies see beyond gender stereotypes so we can build communities that respect everyone’s contributions, regardless of gender? 

As the speakers indicated, we have to adopt a multisectoral approach to tackle gender-based violence. The media needs to be engaged to help shape perceptions of masculinity. We can start by teaching boys and girls about gender equality and modeling respectful power dynamics at home. 

Thinking outside of accepted gender norms takes creativity, the willingness to change, and courage, particularly at the most personal level.  Sometimes for change to occur, it also takes an external agent (i.e. legal mechanisms), as we saw recently in The Gambia. To me, positive masculinity is about recognizing and acting on gender equality and respecting the human rights of all in a way that leaves the old, tired, and toxic ways in the dust. Men and women should be equally engaged in this journey. When that happens, there is nothing that we can’t do together to end FGM/C and stop gender-based violence.

It’s been a busy year so far in Connecticut when it comes to advocating to end female genital cutting, (FGC)! Here are some updates we’d like to share with you all:

Legislative Developments

On February 4th, in honor of International Day of Zero Tolerance for Female Genital Mutilation/Cutting (FGM/C), State Representative Jillian Gilchrest and State Representative Nicole Klarides-Ditria along with the Connecticut Coalition to End FGMC held a press conference to raise awareness about FGM/C and introduce House Bill 6596: An Act Concerning The Prevention Of Female Genital Mutilation. This proposed bill aims to establish educational programs, provide civil remedies for survivors, and prohibit FGM/C in the state. Connecticut remains one of only nine states without legislation protecting children from FGM/C.

Here’s what one of the event speakers, Zehra Patwa, had to say about the press conference:

“It was an honor to be invited to share my experience as a survivor at a press conference at the State Capitol on February 4, 2025, in recognition of International Day of Zero Tolerance of FGM/C. Since discovering in my 40s that I was cut as a child, I have worked to ensure no other girls go through what I, and so many other girls in communities who practice FGM/C, went through. 

I thank Lt Governor Susan Bysiewicz, chair of the Governor's Council on Women and Girls, and Rep Gillian Gilchrest, along with all the sponsors of bill 6596, who have lent their unwavering support to end this harmful cultural practice on girls in Connecticut. It is comforting to me that this bill has bipartisan support through the tireless efforts of the Coalition to End FGM/C and I beg the House to pass this bill as soon as possible so that not one more girl has to live with the trauma that FGM/C can cause. Because one girl cut is one too many.”

The bill has now made its way to the Joint Committee on Judiciary, a crucial step in ensuring legal protections are put in place for FGC survivors and at-risk individuals. 

Recognizing The International Day of Zero Tolerance for FGM/C

Connecticut’s Lieutenant Governor Susan Bysiewicz, a strong advocate for passing legislation on this critical issue of FGM/C, and who also attended and spoke at the Feb 4th Press conference presented, shared with the public that her office had issued a citation recognizing February 6th as International Day of Zero Tolerance for FGM/C. This citation also commended the work of the Connecticut (CT) Coalition to End FGM/C, of which Sahiyo is a founding member, and it acknowledged our coalition’s ongoing advocacy efforts to urge collective action to protect women and girls from FGM/C. The Governor of Connecticut, Ned Lamont, also issued a Proclamation from his office, which Bysiewicz presented to the crowd at the press release as well. 

Moving Forward

Ahead of the public hearing for the Joint Judiciary Committee, date yet to be set, our Coalition is  urging Connecticut lawmakers to support passage of House Bill 6596, ensuring that this legislation moves forward into law. We also call on Connecticut residents to join the movement to protect women and girls from FGM/C by signing our Call to Action to urge your Connecticut representatives to sponsor and support this bill. 

Each year, Sahiyo hosts an annual Activists Retreat to gather anti-FGC activists in a safe and supportive space, where they can engage in meaningful discussions about FGC. These retreats aim to foster collaboration, share insights, and strengthen efforts to eliminate this form of gender-based violence. The retreats include educational programs, self-care activities, and presentations from advocates engaged in anti-FGC advocacy initiatives in their communities. 

Below, Zahara Kagalwalla, a 2024 retreat participant, reflects on how the experience expanded her community and shares what she’s looking forward to in the next retreat.

When I signed up for Sahiyo’s virtual Activist Retreat in the summer of 2024, I expected insightful discussions, but I didn’t anticipate the deep sense of connection that would emerge—even through a screen. The excitement began weeks before the retreat, when a surprise box from Sahiyo arrived at my doorstep, filled with swag, informative materials, and wellness tools—a tangible reminder that I was about to join a powerful community.

When I opened the box from Sahiyo, the first thing that caught my eye was a beautifully designed coloring book—an unexpected but powerful reminder that activism isn’t just about policy; it’s also about healing. 

The retreat was packed with powerful sessions, but a few moments were especially memorable:

Hopes for the retreat: Things started with an intimate conversation where we shared our aspirations for the retreat. Some attendees wanted more knowledge on the legal landscape surrounding FGC, while others wanted to tap into the work of other activists to learn how they may advocate against the harmful practice. I loved that we kickstarted the retreat with the topic of intentionality and how we may help each other on our journeys.

Reflections from past activists: We had a viewing where we watched reflections from activists who participated in the Voices to End FGC workshop.  By hearing these reflections, I was reminded of the power of storytelling in advocacy. 

Art time: The Sahiyo team sent coloring books and organized a guided coloring activity as a form of self-care. I loved that we could step away for a brief moment from the sometimes heavy discussions and sessions to be in solitude, yet also in the company of this community. 

This year, I am on the planning committee for Sahiyo’s in-person activist retreat, and I couldn’t be more excited for what’s in store. A few things I’m especially looking forward to are:

The Intergenerational Dialogue Workshop: Activist Retreat  planning committee members and Sahiyo volunteers, Umme and Nur, are crafting a hands-on workshop focused on how different generations perceive, discuss, and advocate against FGC. I can’t wait to explore ways to bridge generational gaps in these difficult yet crucial conversations.

In-Person Connection: Virtual retreats are powerful, but there’s something special about being together in the same space. Past attendees have shared how the best moments often happen after official programming ends—late-night chats and laughter over shared meals. I’m eager to meet fellow activists face-to-face, learn about their journeys, and share pieces of my own.

On March 18, 2025, Sahiyo, in collaboration with the Asian Women’s Shelter and Silence Speaks, will host a parallel event at the 69th Session of the Commission on the Status of Women (CSW69) in New York City (NYC). 

The Commission on the Status of Women (CSW) is a global body committed to the protection, advancement, and empowerment of women. Launched in 1941, CSW seeks to highlight the lives of women and girls around the world and find solutions to the problems that face them, such as poverty, education, the gender pay gap, and violence. This year's commission will take place from March 10 to 21, 2025 in NYC.

Sahiyo’s event, “Storytelling as a Tool for Female Genital Mutilation/ Cutting (FGM/C) Survivor-Centered Care,” will feature a selection of compelling stories from our Voices to End FGM/C program showcasing the resilience and courage of survivors. We will explore our storytelling approach and its effectiveness in advocacy and support for survivors of FGM/C, providing insights into how these narratives have been utilized to drive systemic change and enhance culturally competent care. The Voices alumni attending this event are Leena Khandwala, Saza Faradilla, Dena Igusti, and Zehra Patwa.

Additionally, there will be a panel discussion with Voices alum to allow the storytellers to discuss how their stories have supported and uplifted their work, their conversations on FGM/C, and benefited their healing as survivors themselves. The storytellers will also discuss how their stories have been used to further impact in the overall movement to end FGM/C.

The event will be moderated by Mariya Taher, Executive Director and Co-founder of Sahiyo, and Su Young, Associate Director of  Asian Women’s Shelter. We look forward to connecting with individuals dedicated to ending FGM/C and those eager to learn more about this critical issue. 

Event Details:

• Date: Tue, 18 March, 2025
• Time: 12:30 pm - 2:00 pm ET 
• Location: Church Center for the United Nations (CCUN), 2nd Floor, 777 United Nations Plaza, New York, NY 10017 

Registration: https://bit.ly/SahiyoCSW69 

Rachel Aguilar is a fourth-year at the University of Chicago where she is a Dean's, University, and Dewey Scholar. She majors in Political Science and minors in Inequality, Social Problems, and Change. Rachel recently joined Sahiyo as a Policy Intern.

How did you first get involved with Sahiyo?

I first got involved with Sahiyo because I was intrigued by the organization and despite learning about FGM/C in other countries, I did not know that it occurred in the US. Learning that even the “husband-stitch” was considered FGM/C, got me interested in interning for Sahiyo and supporting the movement to end FGM/C.

What does your work with Sahiyo involve?

I am a policy intern! This means that I work to support Sahiyo and various policy-focused state coalitions in their work. I help write and review information packets, compile contact information, reach out to partner organizations, track legislation and official statements, and more.

How has your involvement with Sahiyo impacted your life?

Working with Sahiyo has exposed me to issues within our society, legal, and healthcare systems that I was not previously aware of. It is empowering to be involved with work that aims to support women. I am also incredibly grateful to have an opportunity to experience and participate in the policy process.

What words of wisdom would you like to share with others who may be interested in supporting Sahiyo and the movement against FGC?

FGM/C affects more people than you can imagine. I encourage people to educate themselves and find ways to get involved. Supporting Sahiyo and the movement against FGM/C can be as simple as signing a petition or writing a blog post.

In October 2024 I participated in the ASEAN Queer Leadership Week (AQLW), in Bangkok, Thailand, organized by the ASEAN SOGIE Caucus. I represented the End FGC Singapore campaign and was awarded the Sahiyo Advocacy Travel Scholarship in 2024, which supported my participation in the program. 

The leadership program was aimed at building the capacities of LGBTQIA+ activists in promoting the human rights of all, no matter their sexual orientation, gender identity, gender expression, and sex characteristics (SOGIESC) in broader society. We learned how to respond to the needs of the LGBTQIA+ movement within our spheres of influence. It was the ASEAN SOGIE Caucuses first cycle involving queer activists who work outside of LGBTQIA+ spaces. 

The program participants hailed from nine Southeast Asian countries: Thailand, Laos, Myanmar (Burma), Cambodia, the Philippines, Malaysia, Indonesia, Brunei Darussalam, and Singapore. They were activists advocating on behalf of the rights of the disabled,  labor rights, education for rural children, animal rights, climate justice and sustainability, journalism, and refugee and migrant rights. Of course, the issue of FGM/C falls under sexual and reproductive health rights (SRHR), gender-based violence (GBV), and children’s rights. 

I wanted to strengthen my advocacy work in the anti-FGM/C movements by connecting and building solidarity with regional activists. I wanted to spread the word about the impact of FGM/C, its pervasiveness in our region, and how it is connected to LGBTQIA+ issues. According to Sahiyo’s research on intersectionality titled “Examining Intersections Between Female Genital Mutilation/Cutting and Social Oppressions” (February 2024), barriers to ending FGM/C are impacted by social oppressions such as racism, xenophobia, Islamophobia, hostilities against disabilities and neurodivergencies, and anti-LGBTQIA. With these threads of oppression interwoven, FGM/C survivors such as myself cannot separate them from our survivorship. 

At 18, I learned that my cut was a human rights violation at a feminist-led comprehensive sexuality education workshop. I asked my mother, who readily confirmed that under her instructions, my older sister had brought me to a Muslim woman doctor at a private clinic to have the prepuce (or the clitoral hood) of my genitals nicked. My cut is classified as type 1b FGM/C according to the World Health Organisation categories. My mother reasoned that cutting helps control the female libido (it doesn’t). This belief assumes that the vulva-owning baby will grow up to be a straight, cisgender woman, leaving little room for queer and trans acceptance. 

As a result, I created a digital story as part of the Voices to End FGM/C Digital Storytelling project in the spring of 2022. Voices to End FGM/C is a joint digital storytelling project initiated by Sahiyo and Silence Speaks. I collaborated with illustrator and former Sahiyo Programs Coordinator Catherine Cox, who helped me visualize some intimate parts of my story. Subsequently, I reflected on the ongoing process of creating and honoring one’s story. 

I joined the Singapore campaign due to the lack of trans and non-binary survivor voices in the global anti-FGM/C movements. Trans and non-binary survivors of FGM/C are excluded from the global survivorship data. For example, a female respondent is described as a woman without explicit agreement on their gender identity. This exclusion means that many trans and non-binary survivors are not aware that they were affected or do not have the space to share how FGM/C uniquely affects them. That is what the program participants and I have in common – that our lived experiences and perspectives as queer and trans people are often left to the margins and not centered within the causes that intimately affect us. 

We discussed the impact of being constantly exposed to hostilities and vicarious trauma due to our advocacy work. Starting with assessing our state of mental health, we drew up personal safety plans to communicate our needs to the people around us so that we don’t feel alone in our advocacy. Activism can be a tricky space to be in. As we talk about these issues, we may experience them concurrently. On top of that, queer folks face an added layer of vulnerability. Sharing personal stories may open up old wounds, which contends with wanting to stay professional and level-headed. How do we balance advocating for urgent issues while maintaining some semblance of sanity and protecting our well-being? 

We opened up about our vulnerabilities and the relentless hostilities, as well as holding on to hope. We allowed ourselves to reimagine multiple futures that left no one behind. To achieve the progress and success we Singaporeans enjoy today, we needed to leave some people behind – even at the expense of our people and neighbors. That perspective is reflected in how we treat most issues today, including FGM/C. 

The reason we advocate is that we want to be treated with dignity and believe that everyone deserves to be treated as such. It is an honor and a privilege to help my community in shifting our culture to one that chooses love over fear. I trust that in time we won’t leave anyone behind and that includes trans and non-binary children and survivors of FGM/C. 

About the Author: Afiqa (she/they) is a non-binary survivor of FGM/C from the Malay Muslim community in Singapore. They are a founding member of the End FGC Singapore campaign and a member of the Asia Network to End FGM/C. Recently, Afiqa joined the Non-Binary Southeast Asia collective.